1. Be blunt AF and get yourself out of there.
Come on girls, they’re never going to see you again, you never WANT to see them again, let’t not waste any more time…get the hell out of there!
Honesty is the best policy! You’ve heard that before haven’t you? You don’t need to be mean, just be brutally honest that you’re not interested, you can’t see it going anywhere, thank them for the their time and make a SWIFT escape.
2. Escape out of the bathroom window (like they do in the films).
Are you too nice to ‘Be blunt AF and get yourself outta‘ there but feeling like you can’t live another minute of this HORRENDOUS date? Can they see the exit from where they are sitting so there’s no way of you actually secretly escaping? Is there NO way of you being able to get through the next hour or two without killing over or possibly killing them?
If no to all of the above, THE TOILET WINDOW IS THE ONLY OPTION.. just like they do in the films! Sling the handbag through first and squeeze yourself through. You may hurt yourself but it won’t be anywhere near as painful as sitting through a minute longer of that date.
P.S. If the exit isn’t visable for where they are sitting, just walk out of the door. It’s a much more sensible idea.
3. Pull a sicky half way through.
Oh no! Have you just accidentally eaten cheese when you’re allergic to it? Has something just set your IBS off? Ahh, I don’t know! Make it up, and make it up fast! Call somebody to pick you up urgently or order yourself an Uber! Insist that they don’t give you a lift, you’d much rather be with a member of family or on your own.
This is a situation where you have to think AND act fast. If you don’t you’re going to mess up and you’re going to love VERY silly. Sillier than you already do, because it’s obvious what you’re doing. IF you execute it well, at least they’ll rate your acting skills. Anyway… off you go, and there you are, saved from the worst date in history.
3. Get V drunk. Your body may still be there but the mind has escaped woohoo!
Keep ordering those LARGE glasses of wine on tap! Play the ‘order me the cocktail you think i’d like best‘ game. Explain how much you love shots and how much you think they’d love them too! Do anything you can to make this date bareable.
Who knows, if they handle the situation well, your opinion may very well change about them!
5. Get the girls involved!
Your girlfriends are your most powerful resource!
Whether they talk you into getting a grip of yourself and persevering through the date, coming up with the best excuse, or schedule in the ‘get out’ phone call for when you return back to your date, they will help you through this terrible time! You’ve got this girls!
P.S. It is valentines, so you’ve probably interrupted their date night too! Make sure you apologise to them, and make it up to them next weekend, xoxo